Daelen Morris is a 2020 Washington University graduate who was a walk-on thrower on the track and field team after competing in football, wrestling, and swimming in high school. A John B. Ervin Scholarship recipient, the African-American studies major is now an admissions counselor at WashU.
The UAA “Conversations About Race and Racism” series seeks to lift the voices of people of color and recognize the challenges faced in both athletics and academics at the collegiate level. By sharing personal stories, we hope to elevate the conversation about race to raise awareness and bring about change.
Spaces for Black Student-Athletes
“The most transformative moments for me in college were those when Black student-athletes were able to come together in informal spaces. I remember in my sophomore year we had a Super Bowl party, a chance to eat wings and just talk to one another,” Morris recalled. “Getting to know upperclassmen gave me the chance to get more comfortable with my teammates, but also with the lay of the land of WashU in general as a Black athlete.”
Those experiences were particularly important to him after a unique pre-college experience. “Coming in as an Ervin scholar, my first experience with the school was with a very diverse group of people that shaped my impression of WashU,” he explained. “Going through that scholarship process before I met the broad school body made it a shock to actually start school, not in a bad way, but it was just a lot different. I expected WashU to mirror the program.”
Morris with his brother Aaron
He encourages all Black student-athletes to find safe spaces. “Try and find your community, whether it is the Black community (which I was fortunate to find at WashU on and off the track team) or in different spaces in which you exist. It doesn’t always have to be the same folks or groups that overlap,” he said.
Challenges at a Predominantly White Institution
“Similar to what a lot of Black students face, I immediately dealt with the impostor syndrome. I am a person of color at a high-achieving PWI. Do I really belong here? I also felt like an impostor as a thrower since I was walk-on and had never thrown before,” he described. “Dealing with that in both the athletic and academic sphere was a challenge.”
The additional challenge he faced was finding places to be authentic. “I wanted to find spaces where I could be my full self, a student, a Black guy, an athlete. I sought spaces where I could be all of those things instead of them being separate identities depending on where I was. We all code switch, which is an important skill, but I wanted to be able to talk about different issues that impacted me and maybe not others in that space,” Morris remarked.
Morris cites one instance that was particularly difficult. “One night in my sophomore year, a lot of my friends were protesting about an officer who was acquitted of shooting and killing a Black man who was sitting in his car. That night, I was at a party with my teammates. I was thinking about my friends protesting and wasn’t really present at the party. I should have left before I did,” he recounted. “I was thinking that no one is feeling what I am. Then someone made an offhanded comment about the acquittal and I knew it was a space where I could only be an athlete, but not a place where I could commiserate with anyone about my feelings about current events affecting Black people. It wasn’t a super common experience during my time there, but it did happen from time to time.”
Misconceptions and Assumptions
“A lot of the assumptions I hear are based on a combination of my race and size, including that I am an athlete without any prompt for that. I was on a trip with some of my white teammates when a parent of one of them asked who the NFL player was with them, referring to me. It is often something innocuous like that,” Other times it is an assumption that I couldn’t get into a school the caliber of WashU or that I couldn’t have been there on an academic scholarship rather than an athletic scholarship that doesn’t even exist.”
Being Black and a bigger man, Morris is careful of how he presents himself. “People have told me they expected me to be a lot meaner. I try not to get angry in front of people for that very reason. I am not going to be dominant in every space I am in so I try to disarm people,” he stated.
Balancing Activism and Daily Living
Morris, originally from Peoria, Ill., has been very active in the St. Louis community. He was part of City Faces, where WashU students mentored children in the Clinton Peabody public housing community. “Their affiliation with the college in their home city is through students. I try to learn and understand the disconnect between WashU and St. Louis. That pushed me to get into local work and to get to know the communities in my hometown as well,” he recorded.
He and three friends, including one who ended up graduating with him at WashU, were inspired to do similar work in their hometown. “Peoria can be really stagnant. We wanted to discover and discuss the roots of racial discrepancies. We talked to a lot of city councilors and the county budget person to look at where money is going and why there is such a racial gap in the educational system,” he articulated. “Schools on the South side haven’t had the same resources as others. Even back in high school, some of my friends and I looked at the differences between the Black student experience in AP (Advanced Placement) and IB (International Baccalaureate). In a public school district that is 65 percent Black, why was I the only Black male in my year to graduate from the gifted middle school?”
Though he is very active in the community and around social justice issues, Morris finds the recent awakening of many people to racial injustice to be a doubled-edged sword at times. “There was immediate empathy in 2020 when country-changing and culture-changing events happened. When another officer gets acquitted or another Black body is found murdered, non-Black friends and acquaintances have expressed their sorrow. That is helpful to know that it is hitting others who don’t look like me,” he divulged. “At the same time, it can be a lot to hear from so many people, particularly people I have not heard from in a while. Sometimes I just want to exist. Believe me, I understand why I am protesting and donating. There are days I just want to go about my life as normally as I can.”
Role of Allies
“As an ally, be cognizant of what you are saying and where your thoughts are coming from. It has a lot to do with where you are from and what your privilege is,” he communicated. “Be active in the spaces set up to talk about these tough issues, the issues that hit marginalized communities around race, gender, and sexual identity. Be an active listener, not one who talks over people who are sharing their experiences.”
His advice for allies and people of color alike is to get involved where they live and go to school. “On a broader scale, which is echoed by a lot of people, get active in local elections and politics. Big culture changes happen on a national level, but what affects people day to say is local government. Get involved, even if it means just asking questions.” Morris recommended. “Even as boring as city council meetings can be, it is important to be there and to become knowledgeable about what cities are doing to cultivate equity so that communities are no longer marginalized. It may not feel like you can affect change on a national level, but it is much easier on a local level to know people are listening to what you have to say.”
Role of Teams and Teammates
“Teammates play the biggest role because they maintain the culture, which goes beyond the people of color. Even with more people of color on WashU teams than others, our program is still a place dominated by white student-athletes. We were fortunate to have a push from the athletes on the team and from the school to be understanding, empathetic, and critical of the team and ourselves in the way we interact with one another, the school, the city, and the country we are in,” Morris articulated. “If you don’t have a team carrying that thinking forward and putting it into action, no matter what a coach does, it will die.”
Morris acknowledges that building and maintaining that culture requires hard work. “It is not easy. It doesn’t always come naturally. It is a learning experience, especially when you are trying to combat these years of an educational system that doesn’t teach non-white centered history well or in-depth,” he stated. “Trying to get people to think differently in college is harder because they may be trying to unlearn something, but at least free thought is accepted and valued. Though it is not easy, building that culture successfully makes you better as a team. Part of the reason our program is so successful is because we have a culture where we try to hear everybody.”
Role of Head Coaches
“Coaches can begin to create the culture by encouraging discussions about important issues and making it clear that the words their athletes use to interact with one another matter. After that, it is up to the people on the team to make it work,” Morris remarked. “Spaces where athletes can talk about their experiences at the school and how they are coping with this. Those spaces can be created and pushed by head coaches. They can also make it clear that athletes can talk to them about important issues.”
He believes that coaches can make a huge impact in the way they recruit. “Coaches can recruit in broad areas, changing up where they are looking for athletes, but also showing that talking about issues that matter will be at the forefront of the team dynamic. (WashU Head) Coach (Jeff) Stiles knew that not every student-athlete had the same experience and made sure to provide spaces for athletes to talk to other athletes, not just those from the same background,” he described.